The three C’s of a loving, lasting, happy marriage; commitment, communication and consistency.

Why is consistency part of my three C’s?

When we meet that special someone, and we take the time to get to know them, we are assessing their qualities. Trying to decide if we can relate to this person for the long term. So those qualities we fell in love with are vital to be there after the courting stage is over. That is one reason why I believe longer courtships are important, the more time you spend with someone the better chance for you to see who that person really is. If that same person changes who they are after a few months or years, then that can kill a relationship. When I think of my marriage, I can truly say my husband has been consistent, consistent with who he is, how he treats me, consistent with his love and respect for me. I fell in love with him and those qualities. Him remaining consistent in those qualities has been a vital part of our happiness.

I remember when dating my husband I made it my goal to cook him specials meals. I would take the time to learn different recipes. What man doesn’t like a good meal right? But did I stop doing that after I knew I had “won” him? No, I just worked harder at crafting the cooking skills. I can tell you he still compliments my cooking and loves the passion I put into cooking a yummy meal.

Don’t be taken in by someone that promises you things or tells you impressive things about themselves. While attending college, I met a few of those types of guys and thankfully I didn’t fall for the way they tried to woo me with this sort of talk. My parents taught me values and what to look for in people, so I wasn’t taken in by such individuals.

Relationships are intricate and actions always cause reactions. If we stop doing the things that were appreciated or relied on by our significant other, we should expect and will get an adverse reaction.

How do you ensure consistency in your relationship? Here are a few tips:

1. Don’t start something you can’t or won’t continue. You don’t want to set high expectations that you can’t maintain.
2. Don’t pretend to like something that someone else loves. Eventually, you will stop being involved, and they will wonder what happened and be disappointed.
3. Find out what your significant other likes and keep doing those things. If you enjoy them, then both of you will be smiling.
4. Don’t get lazy about your relationship. You have to keep doing these activities to have a successful relationship.
5. Remember, marriage is hard; it takes work.

Successful relationships have a strong commitment; there are constant communication and consistency.

“A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seems too short.” 
-Andre Maurois